Sunday 4 April 2010

Easter and the Joys of EDs

Sometimes it seems to me that I don't really have an eating disorder at all.
In fact, often when I think about it, I end up with the conviction that somehow it doesn't exist at all. It's all in my head.
Which of course, it is.
Kind of.

Celebration type days like today, faced with masses of food, unable to get to the gym after giving my body such a hammering yesterday, I start to question my doubts. (The absurd irony of having doubts about doubts doesn't escape me).

It is hard to describe the fear of weight gain after a few days of rigid control.

On the upside, driven by the fear, I went for a long walk in intermittent sunshine...
... and took a couple of (poor quality) pictures from the top of the hill.







Anyway.

Happy Easter to anyone who reads. And to those with an ED, well... I guess there are many who will find today difficult. There's a whole other post in there somewhere...

6 comments:

  1. A very Happy Easter to you too. Last pic is absolutely beautiful. Bis hug to you

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  2. pics are beautiful...some days you just got to forget the fight...and let go and see the beauty around you...I'm glad you were able to do that...Stay strong. Sarah

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  3. Sounds like you are stay strong. It will beautiful day when our disorders no longer have ant control.

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  4. Beautiful pictures. I pray you had a wonderfully blessed day.
    Hugs, andrea

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  5. Passing by to show some love. Thinking of you. Hugs

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  6. Happy Easter and thanks for sharing your pictures and your process.

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